Unlock your inner CEO: 5 steps to skyrocket your leadership skills (even if you’re not the one in charge)
Picture this: You're in a meeting, discussing a critical project with your colleagues. The pressure’s on. Decisions need to be made. You can see a possible solution.
So you choose to speak up. And you know what? People listen.
Leadership is not about a job title or level of authority. (If that were true, all the managers out there would be leaders)
Leadership is a way of thinking. It’s a way of showing up at work and in your life.
And the good news is - It doesn’t matter if you weren’t a “born leader.” You can learn, develop, and practice your leadership skills.
I’ve outlined five actionable steps to help you unlock and showcase your leadership potential. These steps aren't reserved for the C-suite. They're for anyone at any stage of their career journey.
So, if you're ready to seize opportunities, stand out in your field, drive your career forward, and make an impact - let's dive in.
Step 1: Stop waiting for a promotion to lead
A job title is something that’s given to you by your organization.
Leader is a title that has to be claimed.
We’ve all had those managers who sucked. And it’s because they weren’t leaders too.
Someone who is only a manager:
Has authority but not influence
Uses their authority and position title to get shit done
Commands and controls
Doesn’t coach
Doesn’t inspire
Doesn’t LEAD
And they probably aren’t very effective. There’s all kinds of research that shows that people don’t leave jobs. They leave managers. And they’re leaving THESE managers.
At the end of the day, your job title isn’t really that relevant when it comes to leading.
A leader, on the other hand:
Steps up
Inspires
Influences
Asks questions with curiosity
Makes an impact
And we’ve all seen it - influence outpaces authority.
Stop waiting for your organization to give you a management title. Because you can lead wherever you are.
And you when you DO get that promotion, it will feel like a no-brainer. You won’t have any of that pesky imposter syndrome. You’ll be that much more effective.
Because the key to leading well when you’re in charge is to practice your leadership when you’re not.
Step 2: Have a clear, unshakable sense of self
Part of what makes ineffective managers so ineffective is that they don’t know who they are. They don’t trust their identities as leaders. They lack confidence. And that lack of confidence can make them at best, ineffective (at worst - straight up tyrants).
An effective leader leads themselves FIRST.
But if you want to do that - You need to have a clear sense of who you are.
We can get so caught up in WHAT we’re doing that we forget to think about WHO WE’RE BEING while we do it.
I hate to break it to you, but everything you do is flavored by you identity - how you think of yourself, your relationship with yourself, and your thoughts about failure and achievement.
If you see yourself as unworthy of leading you’ll miss opportunities to make an impact and live in constant fear that people will find out you’re actually a fraud.
If you think too highly of yourself, you may take dumb risks and take credit for others’ work.
If you’re afraid to fail, you’ll micromanage and never innovate.
If you’re overly attached to achievement, you’ll be so focused on goals that you’ll overlook your human capital.
On the other hand, if you have a clear, unshakable sense of self - people will sense that. You’ll be magnetic. You won’t need achievements to tell you who you are. You won’t need others’ validation. You’ll make decisions with clarity.
If you want to up-level your inner CEO, get right with yourself. Build your confidence. And know who you are.
Step 3: Lead yourself first
If you’re my client, you’ve heard me say this before. You have to lead yourself before you can lead others.
And this means taking responsibility for yourself.
This is probably a good time to put this here, since so many of y’all get confused about the difference:
Self-blame - This is taking a dump on yourself for your decisions. Shaming and judging yourself. Self-blame shuts down learning and growth. Self-blame is NOT self-responsibility.
Self-responsibility - Knowing that you are ultimately in charge of your own thoughts, feelings, and actions. Owning them. Evaluating them. Learning from your mistakes and growing as a result.
Leading yourself means you can acknowledge that your circumstances, team, organization, or supervisor may be sub-optimal, misogynistic, racist, or straight up dicks. But then you ask yourself:
“What can I do in these circumstances?”
“How am I showing up in this environment?”
“Am I contributing to my unhappiness and if so, how?”
“What are my options here? Which choice will make me feel proud?”
When you learn to lead yourself, you build self-trust. You build self-confidence. You own your gifts and talents. And you show up.
Clay Scroggins said, “You may not be in charge, but you are in charge of you!” And well, I can’t say it better than that!
Step 4: Develop emotional intelligence
Leaders understand their own feelings and know how to manage them.
Let me tell you exactly why this is so important. When you manage your own shit, you don’t put it on others to handle it for you. You don’t blame. You don’t spin out in comparison and despair. You don’t go complaining to your reports.
And that means you can lead in a way where your ego is handled - by you. You don’t need everyone else to make you feel secure, validated, or successful. You know that’s your job.
When your EQ is dialed in, you can focus on your team, your work, and your mission.
And here’s what will happen. You’ll:
Be able to read the room - You will start to tune into others’ emotions and be able to respond accordingly
Be better at handling conflict and tough conversations - When people overstep or trigger you, you’ll be able to navigate through those issues calmly and confidently. And you’ll look like a badass leader
Have better boundaries - You will be able to recognize where you’re people-pleasing, say “no” more often (if you struggle with this - check out my free guide here), and have more time to lead the way
Procrastinate less - Procrastination is a coping skill. It’s a reaction to stress and anxiety. When you’re able to recognize and handle those feelings in yourself, you won't have to procrastinate so much.
When you develop your emotional intelligence, you won’t be responding to things in a knee-jerk fashion. You can be strategic.
Step 5: Speak boldly, not braggy
“I don’t want to seem braggy” - I hear this from my clients a lot.
And you know what? It’s hurting your career.
I hate to break it to you, but most of your executive team is too damn busy to go looking for your accomplishments. Your brain has a negative bias and so does theirs. So the squeaky wheel gets the whatever and all that.
If you’re waiting for others to recognize your achievements, you might be waiting a long time. Like, maybe foreverrrrr.
Do them a favor, okay? Point out your amazingness so they can see it. Don’t be shy.
And if you have an idea, don’t wait for others to call on you. Raise your hand. Speak up. Let your voice be heard.
This is what leaders do. It’s what people do when they’re not just doing a job, but building a career.
You can be a confident communicator without coming across like an arrogant butthole. Look:
ARROGANT PEOPLE only feel confident when they’re the best ones in the room. They HAVE to make others look and feel small in order to feel good about themselves. So they’re going to talk about their ideas and accomplishment in a way that doesn’t consider other people’s contributions or feelings. These people suck.
CONFIDENT PEOPLE speak up, speak out, celebrate their achievements, and aren’t afraid to point out their accomplishments. They don’t wait for others to recognize them or hope that people will appreciate their contributions. Because let’s be honest - If a professional kicks ass in their job and doesn’t call it out, did it even happen?
Let’s stop acting like Ratatouille - hiding under a chef’s hat while doing amazing shit.
Leaders don’t hide. They’re bold. They get out there. They shine. They let themselves be seen.
Stop waiting for permission
You don’t need to wait around for a permission slip to start leading. Leaders don’t need someone else to say it’s okay to make an impact.
If you KNOW you were meant to make a big impact, it’s time to stop playing small. It’s time to claim your gifts. It’s time to start leading.
Start with yourself.
Let others follow.
And just you wait and see - Amazing things are going to happen.
If you’re over “doing a job” and you’re ready to build a career, we should talk. Together, you’ll break old habits, get more done, and feel more energized while you do it. Click the button below to learn more about working with me.
Hi! I’m Erica
Wife to Brendan. Mom to twins + one. ADHDer. Slow runner. Coffee drinker. Swear words enthusiast.
I’m a licensed mental health therapist, former management consultant, and certified coach. I help busy professionals get out of their own way so they can achieve more with less stress.
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